Zdzich's Diary: Hunting the Lasagna Cat

Zdzich's Diary: Hunting the Lasagna Cat

🕰️ Saved: Monday, 06:30 am - It's still dark, the coffee is barely brewing, and I already know it's going to be a day full of surprises.

☕ In the morning, as usual, I run into the treatment plant with a mug of coffee in one hand and in the other a plan for the day that is about to go to hell.
Well, and what do I see? On the table in the social hall lies an empty tray of my favorite lasagna. "Again!" - I think. "Someone must have quite an appetite or paws like a cleaning lady who cleans at night."

🐈 Meanwhile, a shape emerges from around the corner - a cat, so clever it could become the head of logistics at my company. After all, he was the one who had been systematically eating supplies from my refrigerator for weeks. And I, like a retard, looked for the culprits among the people.

🎯 Operation Cat Catcher

"Okay, Zdzichu, it's time for a special action - Operation Cat Catcher!" - I say to myself.
"Cup of coffee in hand and into the field."

🏃‍♂️ I begin the chase. The cat sneaks between the pipes and I follow, losing the cup on the way, which lands with a loud "plum" on the floor.
"Well great, first loss, and I'm just getting started!" - I say, trying not to slip on the wet floor.

💥 The cat disappears behind the pump, and I try to squeeze through, but bumping into the hose rack, I make a spectacular "boom" and everything flies around.
"I'm like a tank without rudders," I comment, crawling out from under the fallen equipment.

💬 "Oi, cat, don't think I'll give up!" - I shout.
He just mutters and watches with the seriousness of a Zen Master as my glasses are lost.

🤔 "Who is the hunter here, and who is the prey!" - I wonder, pulling my glasses out of the mud and shaking off my pants.

🥵 After more attempts, already almost powerless and with a cup of coffee replaced by a bottle of water, I manage to catch him.
The cat drops its head into my lap and starts purring like a diesel engine.
"All right, cat, you're at peace, but I won't give you lasagna anymore!" - I say, stroking him.

🧪 Dialogue with Halinka from the lab

At that moment, Halinka's voice from the lab comes from around the corner:

- Zdzichu! Leave that cat alone, it's neither a fox, nor a rat, nor... any emergency!

I pick up the cat, show it to Halinka and say:

- Halina, this is our new lasagna operator. She does more tidying up than many of us!

Halinka rolls her eyes:

- And if a sample goes missing again in the refrigerator, don't look for people to blame.

Zdzichu smiles:

- Well, now I know who is in charge of the lab!

👷‍♂️ Dialogue with Genie

At this point, Genio, a fellow shifter, approaches me with a face as if he has seen a ghost.

- Zdzichu, what are you doing there with that cat? It looks like you have a new associate.

- Well, you know, Genio, this cat is now the official lasagna operator. He helps me control my inventory.

- Lasania operator? Is this some new department?

- Bottom line. So far he's doing better than me with all the logistics.

Genio laughs and says:

- Just remember not to feed him too much - because he will still follow in Zdzich's footsteps and start to combine at the pumps.

👔 Manager asks about the cat

At this point, the manager approaches, furrowing his brow:

- Zdzichu, what's all the fuss about the cat? Why is there a cat flying around in the warehouse, and there are scattered papers and cups?

- Sir, this is our new employee - a lasania operator. You have to give him credit for being able to take care of supplies.

- Lasania operator? What about the health and safety and sanitary authorities?

- Health and safety is probably a good deal with him, and the sanitary inspector knows the cat well," mutters Zdzichu under his breath.

The manager shakes his head and walks away, and Zdzichu says with a smile:

- Well, for now the cat is in training, but looking at him, I think he has a future in this profession.

📜 Moral

Even in the dirtiest place you can find a friend. And sometimes it takes a lot of patience to catch a cat... and survive its ideas.

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